Hold Hands to the Alzheimer's disease

My Father's Battle on the Alzheimer Disease

but more

A Tribute to my mother

One thing I learned about this disease, never stop holding hands to those suffering.

When my father was diagnosed with the disease, we did not react as we would now, after living his story.

We were not aware of of how it would be the years to come and the intense pain it would generate in the whole family.

How long had our father had Alzheimer's before it was even diagnosed?

My sisters and I have asked ourselves that question a thousand times .

We know it must have been at least fifteen years. His memory and his battle had been going for a long time, but we thought it was just age and personality.

Thinking of those years when he started being aggressive to my mother and to the neighbours, the jealousy crisis, the memorie loss, the wake up nights and much more.

When we finally got the news from his doctor, it did not come as a big surprise but we didn't know exactly how to handle it and how bad could it get.

We finally believed what was going on, when he started putting my sister shoes on, getting dressed with my kids clothes, drinking or eating anything around him no matter how bad, running way or disappearing for a while and all the other things that only we can understand.

My mother decided she would handle it and for the best of his last days he always stayed home.

I often think how lucky we were to be able to give him a warm and cosy home until the end.

She had gone through the worst of taking care of my father, when he was in a more alert stage, constantly having catastrophic reactions and being aggressive. After some years he was getting into a calmer stage, except at night. At times he could be so sweet and loving, and more fun than he had been before Alzheimer's.
We always felt that even on his last months, he knew he was home and love was his motivation to be alive.

He loved hugging and although he was always so tender and caring for his daughters, he became even more towards the end.

My mother was the one waking up with it every morning and going to sleep with it every night, she said.

"You know, I think in that moment before you wake up, I think for a moment he almost forgets, and then of course (he) realizes that we are where we are."

My mother had to feed him, bath him and specially staying by his bed side. The last couple of months it was like my father was falling into a deep sleep, not responding much at all when we held his hand and talked to him.

Then on November the 7th 2006 , he died.

It all starts by a long period where they live so much in pain because they realise what they do and how fast they are loosing capacities. It is an embarrassing period for the pacients.

Then it goes to a period where they start not remembering well about what they do and therefore do not have a clear conscience of their state.

To the final period , the pain reverts totally on the family as the pacient do not remember ,feel or have any kind of idea of what they do or how they react.

Known as "the long goodbye," Alzheimer's disease is increasing at an alarming rate as someone is diagnosed with the disease every 72 seconds.
By the year 2030, the number of Alzheimer patients could approach 8 million and if scientists can't find a way to cure or prevent Alzheimer's, this number could increase to 11 million and 16 million by the year 2050.

What is in fact the Alzheimer's disease ?

The brain is the source of our thoughts, emotions, personality, and behavior. Because Alzheimer's is a disease of the brain, it will naturally affect what a person thinks, how a person feels, who that person is, and what that person does.
Alzheimer's disease affects different parts of the brain at different times, making it hard to predict how one will behave.

But the disease just gets worse every day. It never gets better.

I once read what Ronald Reagan said when he was diagnosed the Disease:

«The only good thing about this disease is that you get to know new people every day»